Thursday, May 27, 2010

1 Year today!


Today marks the year mark of Camerons accident. I still think to myself how did we survive this year. It has come so fast! As I think about what happened this day one year ago, all I can do is cry. I remember the moment I got a call from Whitney her words "Sarah, call mom Cameron has been in an accident." I hung up proceed to call Mom when my phone started ringing. The call coming from Cameron's phone, I thought to myself "well he is calling me, how bad could he be hurt." I answered the phone and heard an unfamiliar voice he said " Hello Mrs. Campbell, are you married to Cameron Campbell? I answered "Yes, Why?" He proceed to say "I'm officer (don't remember), your husband Cameron has been in a motorcycle accident and things are not looking good. They are transporting your husband to Utah Valley Region Medical Center, you don't have much time, it really does not look good." Words can not describe what I was feeling and thinking. Luckily I was with my mom and brother at the time, I handed my mom the phone, she continued to talk to the police officer. My brother Andrew in the back seat, telling me to pull over so that he could drive, I thought to myself "there is no time." All I was thinking was "get to the hospital, get to the hospital" I must have ran 3 red lights (my brother and mom say more) But I didn't care. Nothing was going to stop me! We finally got there, I jumped out of the car and ran in. Heart racing I ran to the front desk and screamed, "My Husband is here let me see him" They calmly asked me for his name " I answered, they replied we don't have anyone here by that name. I screamed he was just in a motorcycle accident, after saying that she marched me right into a little room. When I walked in I saw Mom (Gretchen). We hugged, But I must say now Mom, that I was so afraid to talk to you because I believed it was my fault that he was in this accident and I didn't know what to say to you, In a way I just wanted you to yell at me and say "why did you ever let my son ride a motorcycle without a helmet." To this day I still feel guilty for Cameron not wearing a helmet that day.

After sitting in the room for I don't how long, the social worker came in and said that we could now see him. I remember a lot of people standing around. When I walked into the room that Cameron was in, again words CANNOT describe what I was thinking or feeling. It was the most horrific thing I had ever seen. After this things really become blurred. I remember doctors talking to me, family talking to me but I can now say I have no clue what anyone said to me. My mind shut off, I just felt like a body walking around with no emotions or feelings, I wasn't thinking, I had just shut down. I remember them taking Cameron in to the OR to put a ICP drain in. Then Going to floor 2, walking into Cameron's ICU room. Later that night they noticed Cameron wasn't doing well and took him in to remove a Hemorrhage from his brain. After this I really can't remember what went on. I remember feeling so lost, just wanting Cameron to come to me and say everything would be okay, but it never happened. I felt so alone, Emotionless, Mad, Sad, Scared, Empty, Helpless, and Fearful that I would never hear my husband voice again. I remember calling his voicemail over and over and over again just to hear his voice. I had nothing left but my sweet Eliza-Jane inside me, the only thing that kept me going. After two weeks of being in the ICU, Cameron started to show signs of improvements. I remember that all the little things to other people who Big things to us, but not wanting to take up too much of your time, I will continue on. After being in the ICU for a month and little bit, Cameron was moved to rehab. I remember seeing all the little improvements and big improvements (ie; talking, walking, ect). Then just a few days before July 24 Cameron came home to me! Still recovering and adjusting ( with some hard times in the mix) and then Welcoming the birth of our BEAUTIFUL daughter Eliza (who also had a hard year). This year has been one of the worst but best years of my life.

I just want to take a few moment to thank everyone.

Thanks to everyone for your prayers in this time of need.
Thank you to Cameron's family who were amazing support.
Thank you to Cameron's parents who slept at the hospital those first couple of weeks. You both we such a strength to me and I appreciate all that you both did. But want I'm most appreciate from you guys was raising such a strong, kind, loving, passionate, smart, wonderful son. You both made Cameron the man he is today and for that I'm truly grateful. Love you both.
I'm thankful for family and friends far and wide for all your prayers, phone calls, messages, and kind words.
I also must thank my family for everything you have done for me. For allowing us to move in, taking care of me. Making sure I had everything, having meals for me (Wendi).
To my mom, who pulled me through the whole experience. She became my protecter and the one that lead me through it all. She took everything on and dealt with everything. I know I didn't have to do anything because my mom was there to pick up the pieces and put things back together.
Thanks to my dad who was my rock through it all.
Thanks to my brother and sister who sat with Cameron so I could get rest.
Thanks to everyone who came and saw us and expressed their love for my WONDERFUL husband.

But what I'm most thankful for is my wonderful husband and for our Lord and Savior. With out the loving guidance of our Heavenly Father and Savior none of this could have been possible. I am truly grateful for this gospel and the strength it has given to me. I love Cameron so much and cannot believe the amount of strength he has. He is an example to me and a Wonderful husband. I can't image my life without him, and thanks to our Heavenly Father and this gospel, I will never have too. Forever and Eternity. Love you Babe! I'm so proud of you!!! Happy 1 year!!!!